“Off British Summer Time and back on the old clock. And by “old” I mean 1850 or thereabouts. Greenwich Mean Time, which is Zulu Time and generally Coordinated Universal Time, which means that the British invented time across the universe. Don’t argue. The British invented time and you have to just sit there and like it. We also invented sleep. Previous to our invention of time, sleep in Britain was generally sectional. People would go to sleep after the sun set — “first sleep” — and then wake up in the middle of the night for an hour or two. We’d potter around, visit the neighbours, read, shag. And then return to bed for “second sleep,” which lasted until sunrise. Sectional sleep was killed by industrialisation and the spread of streetlighting, which reached its critical mass around the point that GMT was established. It’s odd to think of sleep as we know it as a modern invention. We are a terrible destructive people and it’s no wonder nobody likes us.”
- Greenwich Mean Time
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